Hi Tumblr, I'm Dad

A blog dedicated to only the best dad jokes

Feed:

“Your dog has no nose, how does he smell? ” “Disgusting”

Sat January 27th, 2018

Do you think he knows?

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/170197922862

Hi daddy ;)

Sat January 27th, 2018

Hey there, son ;)

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/170185385448

A feline princess married a canine prince. It was reigning cats and dogs.

Fri January 26th, 2018

I heard the prince went barking mad after that.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/170160720302

I wasn’t looking for a job digging ditches. I kinda just..fell into it.

Fri January 26th, 2018

Well, if you ever need them, I’ve got some tools for breaking hard ground, just take your pick.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/170149167801

So you like bird puns?Well, toucan play at that game.

Thu January 25th, 2018

So you like bird puns? Well, toucan play at that game.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/170124194186

I used to be really indecisive, but now I’m not so sure…

Thu January 25th, 2018

I used to be really indecisive, but now I’m not so sure…

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/170112197068

Monorail enthusiasts have one-track minds.

Wed January 24th, 2018

Monorail enthusiasts have one-track minds.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/170086232718

Whether it’s pancakes or baseball, the most important thing is the batter.

Wed January 24th, 2018

Whether it’s pancakes or baseball, the most important thing is the batter.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/170074292948

The field of archaeology is in ruins.

Tue January 23rd, 2018

The field of archaeology is in ruins.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/170048511195

If you think my jokes are average than you’re just being mean.

Tue January 23rd, 2018

If you think my jokes are average than you’re just being mean.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/170036468062

Haunted elevators always lift my spirits.

Mon January 22nd, 2018

Haunted elevators always lift my spirits.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/170010182289

Y’know, a burial plot is the last thing I need.

Mon January 22nd, 2018

Y’know, a burial plot is the last thing I need.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/169997968302

I used to own an origami business, but after a few years it folded.

Sun January 21st, 2018

I used to own an origami business, but after a few years it folded.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/169970993354

I hate negative numbers and I will stop at nothing to avoid them.

Sun January 21st, 2018

I hate negative numbers and I will stop at nothing to avoid them.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/169957592693

Acupuncture is a jab well done.

Sat January 20th, 2018

Acupuncture is a jab well done.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/169932107177

You’ll get exhausted running behind a car, but you’ll get tired running in front of it.

Sat January 20th, 2018

You’ll get exhausted running behind a car, but you’ll get tired running in front of it.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/169919606394

I’d like to take a moment to thank my arms for always being by my side.

Fri January 19th, 2018

I’d like to take a moment to thank my arms for always being by my side.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/169895615069

My New Year’s Resolution was to start going to the gym, but it just didn’t work out.

Fri January 19th, 2018

My New Year’s Resolution was to start going to the gym, but it just didn’t work out.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/169883934686

Did you hear about the two guys who stole a calendar? They both got six months.

Fri January 19th, 2018

I used to print calendars... I got fired for taking a day off.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/169867892017

I bought a boat.I wasn’t going to, but the pier pressure got to me.

Fri January 19th, 2018

I bought a boat. I wasn’t going to, but the pier pressure got to me.

https://dad-no.tumblr.com/post/169867812747